well, zin and val said i've been using too many damns... so for today's post, let me try to limit it to juz a few... hear that the both of you?! heh.... i had my first ever field camp with my recruits the past week... it was fun, although the weather was freaking hot.... add the weather to this pes c batch and you get a potent mixture... a lot of them couldn't take it and fell out.... quite a number of them were even sent to the medical centre due to the seriousness of their situation.... it was damn tiring i tell ya... we did really stupid things when there was a break in training.... we climbed coconut trees for the coconuts.... it tasted great... we also went to catch crabs when the tide was low.... haha... yea, our camp site was next to the sea.... we played with fire and the thunder flash, which is a very small type of explosive.... now i know why guys behave the way they do after the army... haha...


my first batch of recruits!


that's me doing a demonstration to the recruits.


me with my favourite officer.... not!!


caught by surprise




i love these next 2 pics... its beautiful... for the 2nd one, the plane came at the right timing and i caught it on camera..








one of my recruit's dad juz passed away.... its really sad... it reminded me of my granduncle again.... sigh....

i'm feeling very very confused now.... i'm really at a loss.... i knew the risks involved but i juz felt that i had to take it.... i really gave a lot of thought into it... been thinking bout it for a few months.... the only thing that was holding me back was the fear of losing what we have now.... but now, its at a standstill... after i heard that "news", it really felt as if someone stabbed my heart with a knife... and if that wasn't enough, the knife was twisted.... i guess its juz my fault... i knew that it was out of my league but i still wanted to try.... and now i feel as if my fear is coming true.... the fear of losing what we have.... i probably need to clear things up and tell the truth.... the truth will probably hurt, but i juz need that confirmation.... thats juz me.... i need a confirmation before i stop.... before i stop destroying whatever that is left of what we have....


Riz lost himself at 5/21/2006 06:48:00 pm

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